The Globe Angle

Questionable 5* rating considering that there is paint peeling off the walls, room/bathroom was basic, no extra towels or robes are provided for the hot tub, and there is no guarantee of an evening meal. If you are lucky enough that food is being served that evening, don't expect a choice (for us it was oven cooked pizza or go hungry!) Some background music would have been nice in the restaurant/bar area.

Bath mats both on the floor and in the bath
Adequate lighting in bathroom
Glasses/tumblers for toothbrushes and rinsing teeth
Staff asked if we needed supplies but no actual cleaning done for instance in bathroom

The old single glazed sash windows rattle a bit, and the unshaded light bulbs are rather stark.

It was advertised as a "luxury bed and breakfast," but I wouldn't call it luxurious. Our rooms were much smaller than in the pictures. The mini fridge was not cold. Breakfast was adequate, though nothing special. I would have liked fresh bread/pastries and fruit. The staff was there part-time, so after mid-morning, you might not see them again until then next breakfast; some evenings they were there and served pizza, other evenings not around--we were confused as to what would be provided. When they were there, they were kind, but seemed stressed out.

Needs a good clean and a bit of tlc!

Our bathroom was in dire need or redecorating - the paint was peeling off the walls with no attempt to clean it up . The whole hotel was in need of a total renovation and clean up

This is meant purely to be constructive as there are a couple of things which would be really easy to change.
When we arrived the lady who answered the door seemed a little hurried, like we had just interrupted her. We were given a very brief idea where the room was, what time breakfast was, and handed the key. There was no warm reception or any curiosity about us. (This is picky, but makes a difference).
The room was large but again, a few teeny details -mirror was dusty, pictures hanging at angles no bin in the room for tea bags/rubbish (found a small one in the bathroom). The toilet seat wasn't fixed on properly, so slid about and there was mould/damp on the wall next to it. The bed was okay but quite hard and had a thick winter duvet (it's summer and hot).
When we appeared for breakfast, again, it seemed like the staff had zero interest and apart from taking the order, said nothing. The breakfast was mediocre - not fresh mushrooms etc and seemed like a service station breakfast. Would have been lovely to have some fresh bread for toast if you understand the angle.
We stayed for 2 nights and so I was expecting the bed to be made, but it wasn't.
The whole place had the feel of a tired guest house in need of some love, not a hotel. I wouldn't have minded but we paid £170 per night, so our expectations were high.
2 really easy things to change are
1. Sending friendly check in instructions by email as the phone network round there is non existent.
2. Telling guests in advance, that the pub (only place to get an evening meal on a Monday or Tuesday) stops serving food at 8pm.

I really hope this review can result in some positive changes as I hate leaving ones like this.

The grounds are in need of attention, the one jacuzzi had sand in it
There were cobwebs on windowsills along with dead flies on the stairs
There apparently was a cocktail hour the one evening which we would have joined but did not find out until the next morning.
Tinned peaches do not cut it for fruit at breakfast for me
While i appreciate we were the only people staying standards should surely be of the same for everyone

The outside of the property. From the street it looks a bit worn. Communication could be better. The staff didn’t pick up the phone and check-in information was sent by sms. Who checks that?

N/a

The hairdryer , it was useless ! Please , long hair needs a decent hairdryer. If I were to be picky the towels were also very small .

Nothing!